O, Happy Fall

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

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Last Sunday (Nov. 27), we attended our typical evening Mass. There was candle light, lots of incense, and the readings and music were proclaimed by young adults. The phrase that stood out to me was from Colossians 1:18, “He is the head of the body, the church.”

Over the course of the past week, my attention kept focusing on David as the “head of the body,” or in this case, my spiritual leader. The phrasing of the verse from Colossians is akin to a verse from our wedding readings, Ephesians 5:23, “For the husband is head of his wife just as Christ is head of the church, he himself the savior of the body.”

I felt called to listen to David about my sabbatical. I’m only halfway through. I’m antsy. Restlessness was the major sentiment last week. Yet in it, I sensed the Lord asking me to let David lead.

And when I talked about my restlessness, David encouraged me to take the full year for my recovery. He asked me not to run ahead with plans for the future yet.

That’s not the answer I wanted to hear.

Gradually, however, I see really good things about David’s approach, for our entire family. For instance, David is studying web development. He has wanted to for years, but we never figured out how to make time for it before. Also, the kids are able to have a lot more bonding time with both David and me, now that I’m home to help out. I can see that my sabbatical, even in my impatience, is bearing good fruit.

This entire process of restlessness and trust reminds me of a favorite portion of the Exsultet proclamation, from the Easter Vigil liturgy. I love that this prayer is meant to be sung in a pitch-black church, to the singular light of the Easter candle. The line goes, “O happy fault, O necessary sin of Adam, which gained for us so great a Redeemer!”

One of the ways I regularly fall from grace is impatience. It was showing up quite clearly last week. Yet, through falling into impatience, I was able to cling tighter to David, to accept the way he serves the kids and me as head of our household. I even come to see other wonderful blessings that are occurring in the midst of the struggle.

What are your “happy faults” this week? Are you able to see God lifting you even as you fall? Whether or not we can recognize Divine Providence in our stumbling, let’s end together in another prayer that's best set to candlelight. From the Hallow App, here’s a blessing for Advent, by Henri Nouwen:

“Lord Jesus, Master of both light and darkness, send your Holy Spirit upon our preparation for Christmas. We who have so much to do seek quiet spaces to hear Your voice each day. We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us. We who are blessed in so many ways long for the complete joy of Your Kingdom. We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy of Your presence. We are Your people, walking in darkness yet seeking the light. To You, we say, “Come, Lord Jesus!”

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